Suicide Squad Is Garbage 


What a steaming turd of a movie. The only thing even moderately original was Jared Leto’s Hot Topic emo band version of The Joker and Margot Robbie’s sexy Halloween costume Harley Quinn. 

It’s not like these performances are stellar or anything. They’re just better than the CGI token black crocodile (really, all you want for a reward is BET in your sewer cell?) and the budget version of Tom Hardy as Captain Boomerang. 

My biggest irritation with the Joker is the word “Damaged” written on his forehead. Look, we get it. The Joker is extra crazy. But show us he’s crazy. Let him be dark. 

You get glimpses of it, especially in the courting and sometimes rejection of Harley Quinn. Margot Robbie is pretty solid as this character and totally watchable. 

If the studio really wanted something original, they could’ve done a Harley & Joker movie where it plays up the sinister serial killer side of their crimes. Sort of like a DC Comics version of Natural Born Killers. Then you could use Batman as an obsessive crime fighter that’s after them. You know, the kind of detective that stares too deeply into the abyss. 

Suicide Squad is guilty of every sin critics accused it of. Especially unoroginality. Slow motion shots of shells hitting the ground in a gun fight? Sure. Nostalgic music playing over montages? Oh yeah. Will Smith as a reluctant hero with an iffy past? Sure. Why not?

No one should be surprised. But I think this kind of shit is almost a crime against creativity. It takes so much money and time and resources to make a movie like this. The audience is going to see it no matter what. So why not break new ground? 

I thought Deadpool was stupid, but at least it had the balls to be R rated. 

Film history is full of ensemble casts of baddies. Look at every good Quentin Tarantino movie and all the films that inspired him. Even when they “do the noble thing” it gets dirtied by their badness. Letting evil characters be evil is part of the fun. 

Anyway. Fuck this movie and everyone involved. Except Margot Robbie. She gets a pass because she seems like she could be legit crazy and has a nice butt. A shallow observation for sure, but whatevs. 

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